96 tears (ninety6tears) wrote,
96 tears

Big Bang Mix: "Reconciliation"

This is my mix for betweenthebliss's truly frakking awesome startrekbigbang contribution, "Reconciliation". :D

Post contains SPOILERS for the fic.


+songs should all be mp3s. individual songs available per request.
+thanks to betweenthebliss for the bitchin' front cover and being so fun to work with.

Placebo; Pure Morning

A friend in need's a friend indeed,
A friend who'll tease is better,
Our thoughts compressed,
Which makes us blessed,
And makes for stormy weather,

A friend in need's a friend indeed,
A friend who bleeds is better,
My friend confessed she passed the test,
And we will never sever

Marcelo Zarvos; The Pawn

"How do you do that?"

It is not the first time Jim has asked that question, but he means something different by it each time, forcing Spock to ask for clarification. "How do I do what?"

"Read me like that, just, I don't know, reduce me to this mathematical probability you can predict like a goddamn barometer."

Spock would like to point out that his ability to predict Jim's actions is in no way related to mathematics or probability, and that he is in many ways easier to read than any archaic weather instrument. What he says instead is much more diplomatic. "I was merely pointing out your tendency to sympathize with those who-- as you put it-- follow their hearts. It is a trait you prize and one you emulate, therefore it is hardly more surprising for you to respond to the President's emotional warmth than it is for me to respond to her intellect." He moves his bishop; Kirk takes another pawn.

"Alright, alright," he says with a wave of his hand. "I just hate it when you analyze me."

Alexi Murdoch; Breathe

"You really think we're gonna make it out of there in one piece?" she asks, her voice so soft he has to lean in to be sure he's heard her right.

"Yeah," he says slowly, "I do."

She reaches down into the drawer beneath the mattress and pulls out a cigar, offers him one. He takes it, she lights them both, and they smoke in silence for a minute. Jim lets her work through it, waits for her to reply. "I don't think I will," she says as she exhales.

And all the suffering that you've witnessed
And the hand prints on the wall
They remind you how it's endless
How endlessly you fall
And the answer that you're seeking
For the question that you found
Drives you further to confusion
As you lose your sense of ground

So don't forget to breathe
Don't forget to breathe
Your whole life is here
No eleventh hour reprieve
So don't forget to breathe

The Cardigans; War

Don't retreat
I've loaded my gun
With blood, with...

Hear the dust roll over the floor
Why must you sleep?
Come crush me now, i'm armed
And ready to die
Come on, it's war, come on

PJ Harvey; You Come Through

"Come on, Spock. Don't pretend you like it better when it's boring."

The corners of Spock's mouth curl and Jim feels his smirk smooth out, more like a smile. "I do not prefer boredom-- but I would not mind if our next mission did not put any of the crew in danger of being killed."

"Yeah... that'd be nice." He's surprised at his own sudden surge of emotion; he shakes off the tightness in his chest, but the fear is harder to dispel. He turns, grabbing Spock by the elbow to make him stop. He knows he's an open book to Spock; he probably doesn't need to say this, but he's going to say it anyway. "You better come back."

The sun will bring back
Treasures for us
Come on my friend
Drink to good times
Golden wishes
To your health and mine

You come through for me
You come true for me
You be well for me
You come through for me

West Indian Girl; What Are You Afraid Of

Roslin's expression shifts from a smile to one of deep sorrow, then back to a smile again just as quickly. "I'm just a schoolteacher," she says. It is not a protest; Spock understands. They are all only mortal, and if his elder counterpart's belief in destiny is to be upheld, Spock thinks it is built most strongly on the relationships they have to one another.

He thinks of Jim then, of the times he has heard his friend ponder the oddity in his inauspicious beginnings having led him to where he is now, and says, "Captain Kirk would sympathize, I think."

She glances sideways at him, her smile speculative. "You know him very well."

Spock nods and says carefully, "He is a good friend."

"And a good captain. He puts himself on the line for his crew, just like Bill." She hesitates for a moment, pressing her fingers to her lips, then says quietly, "He would trade himself for you, if you were captured."

Spock looks away and swallows. There is a pause of seconds, then he says roughly, simply, "Yes."

"And to get him back, you would do--

Spock does not interrupt, especially not people he respects, but the words tumble from his mouth before he has fully formed them in his head. "Whatever was necessary."

There's no chance of losing
When there's no chance at all
As time goes by, I forget why
From a distant view it might still be true
There's a part of me that lives for you.

What are you afraid of?
What are you made of?
What are you fighting for?

Snow Patrol; Somewhere a Clock is Ticking

Jim feels more exhausted than he did before he laid down to sleep. He knows this is a chance to do something different, but he's not sure what that is or how he'd manage not to screw it up. He is very tired of being a starship captain; Gaila's words return to him, You're only twenty-seven. It occurs to him that maybe that's a little young to end up consistently being the only thing standing between the Federation and enormous disasters.

That's a tidal wave he doesn't want to let out, though, and despite the exhaustion and building anxiety he finds it easier to hang onto the persona of Jim Kirk the starship captain than Jim Kirk the guy who's too stupid to keep a handle on the most important relationship in his life, the guy who can't tell where he stands with the person who matters more to him than just about anyone else.

I've got this feeling that there's something that I missed
Don't you breathe
Something happened, that I never understood
You can't leave
Every second, dripping off my fingertips
Wage your war
Another soldier says he's not afraid to die
Well, I am scared...

Wolf Parade; You are a Runner and I am My Father's Son

"So what now?" he asks, his eyes on hers while his fingers move absently over the chords of the Moonlight Sonata.

She shrugs, one shoulder rolling forward. "Whatever's next," she says after a moment's silence. "The cylons are still out there..." she pauses, then adds, her mouth twisting around familiar words, "We're gonna fight 'em till we can't."

He nods like it means something, then clarifies, "I mean for you-- what's next for you?"

It sounds like a challenge, and it sort of is; she doesn't want to talk, but there's not a hell of a lot of time before they part ways, and Jim doesn't want things to settle like this before she goes. "You think I'm holding out on you?"

"No idea," he says blithely. "I just want to know if I can expect to see you the next time our ships cross paths."

watching you run
into the high noon sun
watching you run
farther than guns will go
you are a runner
with a stolen voice
and you are a runner
and I am my father's son

Coldplay; High Speed

"It was not exactly a conscious decision."

"That only makes it a bigger deal." She pauses before adding, "I don't know his life story, not like you probably do, but I'm willing to bet there haven't been many people in Jim's life who'd've done something like that without thinking about it." She doesn't need to elaborate; in battle, stopping to think is often the difference between life and death, and Spock's choice to put Jim's life before his own was so automatic as to be unconscious.

Spock exits the stall and Thrace shuts off the water, making his words echo in the sudden quiet. "He has been-- he is," he corrects deliberately, "a dear friend." Perhaps now having already stated this admission to the President, it is easier to repeat; he does not hesitate before saying, "There is nothing I would not give to ensure his safety."

Something passes through Thrace's eyes, an old sorrow perhaps, or nostalgia. Then she grins, unexpected and brilliant, and holds out her arm for Spock to lean on. "Gods, Spock, who'd've thought-- you, a romantic."

Can anybody stop this thing?
Before my head explodes
Or my head starts to ring
We've been living life inside a bubble
We've been living life inside a bubble

Confidence in you
Is confidence in me
Is confidence in high speed

Pink Floyd; Pigs on the Wing, pt. 2

and I know that you care for me,
so I don't feel alone,
or the weight of the stone,
now that I've found somewhere safe

The Verve; Lucky Man

More or less
It's just a change in me
Something in my liberty
Oh, my, my
Coming and going
I watch you look at me
Watch my fever growing
I know just where I am
But how many corners do I have to turn?
How many times do I have to learn
All the love I have is in my mind?

Well, I'm a lucky man
With fire in my hands

Tags: bsg, fanfic mixes, fanmixes, music, st, star trek big bang

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